Know-Nothing Trump supporters

Whom I have warned for the last ten years

For the last ten years of my life

YOU OWE ME MONEY!!

Remember all the people 

People in this country who denied 

Denied that disappearances and crimes against humanity

Would take place under Trump?

CRIMES AGAINST HUMANITY!!

Remember when I told you

That crimes against humanity would take place under Trump?  

Yeah, sure you do  

They smeared themselves greasily all over social media

All over social media with their denialist know-nothing gaslighting windbagging 

And I arrayed myself in armor to combat them

Did you?

They invaded and occupied our families, converted our friends

Coverted themselves among the masses in the form of any given stranger

Remember how I said they would owe me money for being such a know-nothing?

I SAID THEY WOULD OWE ME MONEY

I SAID THEY WOULD OWE ME MONEY

For being such an intellectually inert thing as a practitioner of willful ignorance

Willful ignorance and the obfuscation of facts

The obfuscation of facts to such an extent

To such an extent that I have to stop what I'm doing 

Stop what I'm doing and educate them?

Educate them?

Again?

We already tried that, remember?

Remember when they had the chance to fund more teachers in red states

In red states they had the chance to fund more teachers

To fund more teachers or to cut funding to schools

To cut funding to schools means they hate education

They hate education, conservatives do, so they cut funding to school programs

They cut funding to school programs because they hate education

Remember when they cut funding to school programs 

In a fit of blind conservative obeisance

Obeisance to a foul philosophy

To hate education as if born and raised to the task?

I remember that

Because I had to survive in that small town

In that small town with their small system

Alongside their own children getting threshed in their small system

A small town system of oppression that will forever cure a man from looking on rural living with a kindly mien.

I tried to educate them, remember?

Them children from that there small town, remember?

Remember my life as an adult all them years ago?

All them years ago when the parents of all them children

Tried to cut education funding altogether

Altogether now

For that they altogether hated education.

I remember when

In that there town

Trying yesterday to educate them children of tomorrow

I tried to educate them children

If children like them educated may be

Maybe it could have been worse

Worse than that

Than that them children of yesterday 

Would grow up to resemble their parents' ignorance of yesteryear?

Why, if teaching 'twere a calling, then consider me one of the charmed

Charmed to perform for you here on Facebook tonight

On Facebook today

Every day and night

Educating the spawnling and know-nothing alike

Educating them over and over again for days on end

For days on end I had to school them people, remember?

Effing days on end.

Will I have to call them a dunce in public to make it clear that I wasn't joking?  

I wasn't joking, clearly - the dunces owe their teacher money.

THEY OWE THEIR TEACHER MONEY!!

I says and then I says it again, they owe their teacher money and then 

THEY OWE THEIR TEACHER MORE MONEY!!

To paraphrase a certain school principal I once defied, 

I'M GOING TO TAKE IT OUT OF THEIR WALLETS OR I'M GOING TO TAKE IT OUT OF THEIR HIDES.

Like back in the goddamn good ol' days 

Days when you paid your schoolmarms directly, got it?  

Got it, you bunch of filthy rich techknow-nothing degenerates?

I'm still alive to collect and now 

YOU OWE ME MONEY!!

You can check for yourselves as time goes by 

As time goes by whether and to what extent 

To what extent this fundraising effort serves to line my coffers 

To line my coffers with the filthy lucre of the filthy rich

The filthy lucre of the filthy rich

The filthy lucre of the filthy rich, say it with me

Say it with me, 

WE'RE GOING TO TAKE THE FILTHY lucre FROM THE FILTHY RICH

OR WE'RE GOING TO TAKE IT OUT OF THEIR HIDES

I have a prediction to make and 

if my prediction plays out true then you

You will also owe me money

dear reader.

Dear reader, 

Something tells me the filthy rich might not have been paying attention in class

they might not have fully absorbed the lesson I have to give them

I have to give them a lesson, you see, and something tells me they haven't fully absorbed it yet

Haven't they fully absorbed it yet, dear reader of the future?

I speak to you now from a future past

They haven't fully absorbed it yet, have I got that right, future humans?

I predict the filthy rich somehow haven't yet learned their lesson quite.

Quiet, future humans

Future humans,

When next you catch one of those arrogant brats with their filthy little paw in the family cookie jar,

Reach not, I say, for the ruler

For the ruler, reach rather for the chainsaw 

The chainsaw I says, yep

Yep, try going after that little troublemaking brat with a chainsaw until they learn their lesson

Going after them with a chainsaw might get the message through

Or drive the message home

Or post the most important emoji they're ever going to see

See, you have to cut through their veneer of indifference

So blubbery their hide

Their hiding cannot last forever

Go after them with a chainsaw since that's what they've done to us

THAT'S WHAT THEY'VE DONE TO US

Why not give it a try?  

Remember when the Resident-in-Chief said, 'why not give it at try?'

If you still don't know why not

YOU NOW OWE ME MONEY.

If you sat at home

If you sat it out

If you laid down for the know-nothing fascists 

because you believe, pathetically, that it's easier to give an authoritarian what they want 

If you would rather give an authoritarian what they want instead of fighting

Instead of fighting back, you sorry quitter - 

YOU OWE ME MONEY!!

The chainsaw, dear reader of future humans

That's what the know-nothing horde has taken to us 

They have taken the chainsaw to us and we know it 

We need them to know that we know 

Make sure they know that, please  

Please make sure they know you know by donating below.

THEY OWE US MONEY.

Future hordes make future hoards possible

So, if possible, reach deep within your personal inner leathery wallet

And remember that, as we're in the season for giving

Forgiving your enemies

For giving your enemies a swift kick in the arse

For as far as Mr. Techno-Bro Richie Rich sees the world

Every season as just another 

Season for the taking.

Consider the gruesome truth that

After future humans amputate the cookie-thieving arms of those filthy degenerate brats

No hard working

Fair dealing

Education loving schoolmarm 

Will ever have to rap their knuckles again.  

While I appreciate your attention, now you should stop reading and: